A different kind of Mother's Day

It's just at midnight here and so it is Sunday. A special Sunday at that. It is International Bereaved Mothers Day. That's kinda a mouth full to say 'I have lost a child and so I don't quite fit in on the OTHER Mother's Day.

I think this day is perfect for those of you like me. Let me tell you why.

The first traditional Mother's Day after Bailey passed was kinda hard for me. It had been nearly 7 months since she passed and I was starting to deal with my grief. I knew in my heart that I was a mother but I had nothing to show for it but a scar across my belly. And that I was not going to be sharing with everyone in public. We didn't attend church at the time so we decided that we would go out for breakfast and then have a nice dinner at home later. Hubby and I went to one of the chain breakfast places, you know the International one. We were having our breakfast when suddenly this girl came from the back with a basket in her arms. The basket was full of carnations. She went table to table handing out the flowers to the Moms. She came to my table and nearly passed hubby and I by. Hubby asked if I could get a flower. She said these flowers were for Mothers. He said She is a Mother. Just then the girl looked at me and said "Then where are your kids?" Without skipping a beat I replied, "MY DAUGHTER IS DEAD!" She didn't say anything, laid a flower on the table and went on about her business.

I couldn't decide if I was more hurt or angry. How dare her question me? It was one of those moments when you are so angry you start crying and your heart feels like it's gonna jump out of your throat. I was devastated.  I got up and went out to the car. Hubby made sure to stop by the front counter and have a chat with the manager. I literally could not tell you what happened next. Couldn't tell you what we had for dinner or anything else we did that day. That one incident was IS ingrained in my mind forever. Happy Mother's Day to me.

So now there is a day that is perfect for me to openly remember my babies that aren't with me. To celebrate that I created their lives no matter how short their time was. I am their Mom and I always will be and nobody can take that away from me, especially today.

If you are a Babyloss Mom like me, I hope you take time to celebrate yourself today. Be gentle on yourself today no matter where you are on your journey and simply focus on the fact that YOU ARE A MOM!

Please visit International Bereaved Mothers Day on Facebook. In the photo section is a gallery of flowers like the ones in the picture below that you can use and share with friends and family that celebrate in this special way as well.